Monday, June 27, 2011

Life Changing


That's the only phrase I can think of to describe the last few days. I have to tell you that every time a missions team rolls into town I pray for their lives to be changed, but the reality is my life is changed every time there is a group here. This week I am blessed to work with a youth group from Zanesville, Indiana, the minute this group stepped off the bus they were hit with culture shock and a WHOLE bunch of work, I don't think they were expecting right away. But they took it in stride and god work done! I for one was impressed.

The first night they were here they got to experience Baltimore, we had literally hit the block to do a prayer walk and invite our neighbors to church on Sunday, and as soon as we crossed over one block, the police helicopter was out overhead and cruisers were all over the place. It turns out a criminal from another district took off running with handcuffs on, so they were trying to catch him. Welcome to Baltimore friends. In the end this all worked out because we actually got two police escorts for the rest of our walk, and they were actually engaged in what we were doing, its so refreshing to be in a police district where the officers seem to take an interest in what is happening within their community. It was so exciting to watch the students put aside there fears walk up to complete strangers in a completely unfamiliar place, and pray, place their hands inside the strangers and call out to God on their behalf, moments like this make my heart happy.

Sunday was an even more special day, we go to experience Street Church with Baltimore Street Church members, this is what church is about, stripping away everything and getting down to the nitty gritty. Street church is filled with homeless, addicts, prostitutes and the poor, it meets in the middle of an old abandon mall, and in my heart and eyes is the epitome of beautiful. As I looked around and saw my team holding hands in a prayer circle with our new friends, sitting next to someone they didn't know and listening to their story, and learning the 'Sinners Prayer' song and dance with Ms. T, I knew that we were all in for a treat. I love having the opportunity to share my heart and passion with people, yesterday as I stood in the middle of Old Town mall, I almost cried as I watched the people that I love so much be loved on by 30 "strangers" who quickly became friends. In fact, I heard that when the bus pulled up our friends got SUPER excited!

When I didn't think the day could get any better we headed over to what we call "Tent City" which is no longer tent city it's just some homeless people living in a park next to a church. These homeless people are more than just homeless people they are friends, they know John and I and they allow us to come into their home and bring guests. We came with nothing more than Bibles and water, you see most other people who visit the park come with meals, clothing and gifts, but we came with very little other than ourselves and had an experience like none other. I watched Miss Candy tell her story to the girls about contracting HIV, I watched Ms. Dee-dee share her story about being homeless, a prostitute and running from the law and how God has redeemed her, I watched a group of students sit around a homeless man and hang on his every word and he shared his story, as you looked around the park all you saw were mini prayer circles, you saw students laying hands on what most would consider dirty and disgusting people. I am telling you these experiences change my life, I get to watch life transformations in people and it changes MY own life.

Finally, on Sunday we got to attend a Captivate City Night, we were meet at our East Baltimore location, it was a special night because two young people from the neighborhood were baptized. What made it even more special, was one of the team members that may have been questioning something about her relationship w/Christ, she was among 4 people who accepted the gift of Eternal Life last night, it was beautiful.

I tell you the more I look around the more I see lives changing in this group, in me, in the community, kids are lined up waiting outside to play, to come to camp to love us and for us to love them. Today we had our first day of summer camp 27 kids showed up, 27 kids were loved, 27 kids loved us back. It was probably in the 4 years I have been doing camp one of the BEST first days. I am so excited for what camp is going to be like tomorrow.

Finally we had one more life changing experience this evening, want to talk about bringing things home, even for the leaders of these wonderful students, tonight we took the team on a murder walk, we walked to five different murder sights within the city, sights that were researched and personal to us, sights were we could tell a story. While were standing at the sights we challenged the kids to think about what it is like to stand on the site were literally at some of the sights six months ago someone was murdered. We stood outside of a corner restaurant were a 15 yr old was shot and killsed in November, to hear the thoughts that were going through the teams head as they stood their and in other places throughout the evening was evident there was change.





Thursday, June 23, 2011

This is home...



I've been hearing the chorus to Switchfoot's 'This is home' song for the past 24 hours, here are the lyrics:
This is home
Now I'm finally
Where I belong
Where I belong
Yeah, this is home
I've been searching
For a place of my own
Now I've found it
Maybe this is home,
Yeah this is home

Last night my team and I hit the streets of East Baltimore, we knocked on doors on my block, we ventured down Jefferson Street almost to Lakewood, we went up and down Glover St. and we made friends, we greeted people, we invited them to church, we loved people, we invited their kids to join us for summer camp, we prayed, we laughed and some of us went well beyond our comfort zone. IT WAS AMAZING! I don't know any other way to describe it then amazing.

When I am in the "mean" streets of what most people would consider the "hood" I literally feel like I am home, in my element in the place I've been searching for to call my own. Sometimes I have to sit back and giggle to myself that this white girl from Kansas, finds her comfort place in the middle of a place that most people would never step foot in, let alone give it a second thought.

The one thing I have been praying for as I make this transition from quiet Little Italy, to not so quiet Luzerne Ave. is that I would be well received by my neighbors, that they would not only welcome me to be a part of their neighborhood, but that they would also welcome me to live (and share) life with them, experience the pain and heartaches they experience, to celebrate the victories and joys they celebrate. I have prayed they'd join me in fellowship around my dining room table, they'd find peace in my quiet prayer room, they'd join me for bible studies, they'd join me at church on Sunday. I crave community within my community.

If you follow me on Facebook or Twitter, you know that I spend days dreaming about what my life is going to look like in my new neighborhood, I dream about making PB&J's and sitting on the front stoops with the little boys playing ball, I dream about teaching the little girls to make cupcakes and cookies, I dream about sharing Jesus with them, I dream about starting an early morning bible study for the young adult women who live near me, I dream about applying for a Kaboom grant and building a community playground.

Last night as I locked up and was headed to meet my team at Mr. Yogato for our weekly tradition of yogurt and laughs, I ended up being 20 minutes late because every kid in a 2 mile radius needed to know where I was going, who I was going with, and when I would be back, it makes my heart smile to know these kids anxiously await their play time with Ms. Coco! Today as soon as I pulled into the neighborhood, Damian came running across the street (yes I scolded him for not looking both ways) threw his basketball at me, and told me he had been waiting for me to come back, these are the type of relationships I want with my neighbors.

I have a few prayer requests to share with you, last night we had the opportunity to pray with some pretty special people, and also to hear some pretty special requests, I am going to share a few of them with you, so you can join me in praying:

-Ms. "P" she lives across from me, her entire family is in Detroit she moved to Baltimore for a job, she asked us to pray for her family, her health, our neighborhood, city and country.

-Ms. "D" rededicated her life back to Christ a few weeks ago, she told us that Jesus has been popping up everywhere in her life lately, and this weekend her son is getting baptized this Sunday and she wants to pray for him and his journey.

-Ms. "T" asked us to pray for her family, she was so thankful for a job, and she was excited about joining us in church on Sunday, so we are praying that she's able to make it.

-Norman is 14 years old he joined our prayer circle and asked us to pray for school and his family.

Thank you for lifting up my new friends in prayer with me!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Feeling Like Stretch Armstrong

You know that gooey toy we played with as kids, you could pull his body parts and see just how far he could be stretched? That's how I feel this week, a lot like Stretch Armstrong, that God is pulling me in 5,000 different directions to see how far I can be stretched outside of my comfort levels, in my faith and in trusting Him.

Honestly it has done nothing short of make me run into His loving arms. Yesterday I spent so much time reading, praying and meditating in scripture it was so refreshing and renewing, it was just reaffirmed that He has overcome the world, so that I may find Peace and that He will NEVER leave or forsake me. I find great comfort in knowing that when I find myself in tears in the middle of a bed that doesn't belong to me questioning what on Earth I am doing, that His loving arms will find me and comfort me.

Between Saturday and today I have found myself hitting wall after wall when I try to accomplish things that need to get done for hosting our first missions team this summer, however I am not going to let that get me down! I am so excited for this team, I did a little bit of research this morning, this team is in for a treat there are from a town where the population was less than 600 in 2009, the percentage of races other than white is 2.5% combined, I am so excited to see how this team reacts to first stepping off their bus in East Baltimore, to what their reaction is when they get on the bus to leave in a week. I am anxious to watch God take away the fears they may have, to grow them and stretch them in ways they've never imagined, I am excited to watch them get scared and comfortable all at the same time, I am excited to see how they react to murder walks, homeless people, drug users and everything else they are going to experience while they are here.

So during this week while I continue to follow my heart and work to get acclimated to my new neighborhood, new home, new ministry and basically new life, while I continue to get stretched beyond my wildest dreams and God continues to work in my heart in remarkable ways I will continue to run into His loving arms, continue to seek His face and continue to pray for ways to become more like Him.

Would you join me in a few prayer requests this week?

-For rest and renewed strength this week as I prepare for a big week of ministry next week.
-For safe travels for the missions team that will be driving here from Indiana on Saturday, it's approximately at 10-12 hour drive.
-Also for the team to grow in Christ and each other while they are here, and that as a team we will all walk in the steps that God has ordered for us over the next week and that we will have complete grace with each other.

Thanks friends!

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Guest Post: James Yi!

At my last ministry I had the wonderful opportunity of working with and mentoring a group of college students from UMBC and Towson CRU, this summer I get to proudly watch a few of these students go away this summer to places like Ecuador and Africa to serve in Summer Projects, one of these students in James! I am asking James to share his heart with you today, he will be traveling in just a few short weeks to Botswana, Africa, will you join me in prayer for James?

My name is James Yi and I am currently in my final year at UMBC pursing a B.S. in Mathematics. I want to share with you some of the most exciting and humbling experiences of this last year.

Despite what seems like constant struggles in my college career, I have been heavily devoted to a ministry called Campus Crusade for Christ. As you read this today, Crusade is actively involved in over 3,500 campuses worldwide. UMBC has been fortunate enough to be part of this movement for the last three years.

Through Crusade, I had been blessed with the opportunity to serve at MetroKidz where I fell in love with not only the community, but also our fellow volunteers. Our team, led by Colleen, began to spread the love of Christ throughout this area. Serving together every Wed. night was a life changing experience.

MetroKidz was where I developed a heart for young children. Witnessing the struggles these children experience on a daily basis broke my heart. It made me realize how blessed my family was and how much I took that for granted. This was definitely an opportunity for me to give back to the community.

I want to share with you a story about one of the kids I worked with every Wed. by the name of T for the sake of personal privacy. T is in the 2nd grade and lives fairly close to where MetroKidz was held every Wednesday. To say this kid is hyper is an understatement. There have been many occasions where my body has taken the place of a jungle gym for T to climb and I loved every minute of it. Beneath all of the hyper behavior, there was much more to T than I knew at the time.

One Saturday morning I visited T's family alongside a couple other volunteers to meet his family. That morning I had a full list of families to visit, but immediately I knew I would be spending majority of my time talking with T's family. I began to listen as T's mother poured her heart out to our group on her front steps. T's family struggled financially, spiritually, and emotionally. T had recently lost his sister to social services. While listening to her talk, I could see a boy crawling to the door. As I focused my vision towards him I could see his body was deformed to the point where his legs were immobile. It turns out T's mother was raped by a family member and this boy was the result of the tragedy. My heart began to melt on their front step as she continued to tell us the struggles that T's family endures. Through these daily struggles, it amazed me how much she devoted herself to prayer and how firm and grounded this woman's faith in God was.

Despite all of the madness surrounding T's life he was the most easygoing, energetic, ambitious, and optimistic kid in my class. As much as I wanted to be the one teaching T, he taught me how to love and inspire others despite what Satan is doing in our lives. I no longer went to MetroKidz selfishly looking to change lives, but to learn from each and every one of my kids because that's what T taught me.

The day I stepped foot into T's house for the first time was the day I made a dedication to devote my final summer as a college student to go on a summer mission trip to work with young children. I prayed for God to guide me to a place where He wanted me to serve this summer. At Radiate (Crusade's Christmas conference), I found myself in awe at an answered prayer. God has led me to join a team to serve in Botswana, Africa to work with orphaned children and students at the University of Botswana. Praise the Lord!

In order to travel overseas this summer I must raise a total $5175. I have roughly $1900 left to raise by July 2nd. God is in full control and I cannot wait to see what He has in store these next few months. I ask for your helping hand as I humbly attempt to fulfill the Great Commission this summer. There is nothing more my team and I need than your prayers. Please pray that God will provide for us financially, for safety overseas, and that we may be fully dependent on God and not ourselves.

It was a pleasure being able to share with you all what God has been doing in my life recently. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this! I leave you with a quote from a book I am currently reading, "A Million Ways to Die: The Only One Way to Live."

" If I believe the salvation of my neighbor rests wholly upon my words and witness, I might knock on their door every hour. If I believe it rests wholly on God's sovereignty, I might never knock at all. However one works it out theologically, on a practical level the line between God's sovereignty and human responsibility must be kept taut. Tension after tension, always trying to find the sweet spot: This is the life of a Christ follower."

- Rick James

God Bless!


If God is leading you to support James financially if you click his name it will take you to his secure CRU site where you can make a donation.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

A good bop in the head!

So remember when I said that this would be journey? And that I would probably share lots of emotions with you, well here it goes, I knew a few months ago that when I started out on a new journey that would put God at the center, I would be a prime target for the enemy, up until this week I thought maybe just maybe the enemy forgot about me. Ha! How silly of me!

This week has been full of panic, overwhelmingness, heartbreak, fear, worry, self-doubt, frustration and anger! However in the midst of all that the other day I couldn't get these verses out of my head and heart, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose," Romans 8:28 and "So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of it's own," Matthew 6:34 there were on auto-play in my head, because last time I checked I love Him more than anything else in the world, and it's evident I have been called according to His purpose, so why on earth was I letting the enemy get the best of me? It was like for an entire day God was telling me, He is in control and He has never let me down before, so why would I suddenly worry now?

Asking people for help whether its physical help, help through prayer, making my needs known etc., does not come easy for me, but this week I had to humble myself and ask for prayer, I had to surround myself with people who love and care about me, I also had to ask for physical help, and my friends are truly the greatest. I love that when I need to see God the most in my life he makes Himself completely visible.

This week, I was asked how I could believe in God when I couldn't see Him physically in my life, my answer was but I CAN see Him in my life, I see Him through people and acts. This week, I was blessed in ways beyond measure, I was able to comfort a mother who lost her 17 year old son to the streets, after losing another son to the streets just 3 years ago, not only did I get to comfort her, but I got to lead her to Christ, I got to see God move in her pain, I got to reconnect with a group of boys who I met literally in the midst of their "activity" just a little over a year ago, I got to hear stories of how their lives are changing, I got to be the recipient of MANY blessings this week as I watched people who barely even know me, go out of there way to help get my new home ready to move in...

At the end of the day yesterday I sat in my car and I cried, because I realize that until yesterday I missed the blessings of the week, because I got lost in the chaos, and the horrible emotions, as I sat in my car and had a tearful conversation with God were I felt so angry and frustrated it was right their in the midst of those tears, that I really felt like God was bopping me in the head and saying to me, but you have nothing to be angry or frustrated about, you've missed the ways I have blessed you this week. I realized how so often we miss what God is doing in our lives because we are so frustrated by the things that He's not doing, I usually do a pretty good job of praising God for the things He is doing before praying about the things I desire for Him to do but this week, I lost all of that.

So finally as I realized a friend was poking their head in my window to make sure I was ok, because I had been sitting there in tears for almost 15 minutes, I remembered that God will not leave or forsake me, and I quickly recited my favorite verse in my head, "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future," Jeremiah 29:11, and thanked God for the lessons He taught me throughout my pain, fear and heartache this week.

I will leave you with a few prayers that I am praying and ask that you join me in praying

-Praying for Ms. Janice, she lost her son this week "D" this boy was one of the boys I used to spend my Wednesdays mornings with, his mom finally accepted Christ into her life this week through her pain. I want to be a good testimony to who Christ is in her life.

-As I move forward in ministry, I am praying for protection from the enemy, next week my nanny job ends, this has kind of been my security blanket for the past year, and as I move forward I won't have that security anymore, its all in Faith I go, I am excited, overwhelmed and even a little scared, but as I learned this week God is in control, and if God is for me who can be against me?

-Health, I have not felt "normal" in a little over a month, and this week I was given strict instructions, about my sleeping habits, so I am making getting to bed and getting enough sleep a priority, but daily it has been tempting to do just ONE more thing before bed, which would keep me up later than I need to be. I need to be rested as in two weeks, the craziness and fun begins!

Thank you for praying with and for me!

Saturday, June 4, 2011

I have a dream


Okay so you may have caught me in a little fib, I have MANY dreams, however I've had the opportunity to attend a retreat in DC this weekend called Dream Year Weekend it's part of Ben Arment's bigger Dream Year process, this has been an exciting weekend for me as I have realized that every single one of my dreams are obtainable, and in the words of Ben Arment, "Your dreams are waiting for YOU!"

I've known for a while that my dreams are waiting for me, and I have been working hard in achieving them, but there's been a "dream" God has been stirring in my heart for a while, one that I haven't really shared with the world until this past week, one that scares the bejebus (I don't even know if that's a word!) out of me! One that literally three weeks ago I felt like God was telling me it was time to pursue it, my response, "Really God in the middle of all the other crazy transitions, right now?" and His response YES!!!!

Yesterday as I got to Dream Year and people started asking me about my dream, the words that came out of my mouth, were not what I expected would be the dream I would want to focus on this weekend, however as God has taken me on a healing journey over the past few months of my own life, and the fact that my story has been instrumental in changing the life of a girl I met just a few short weeks ago, I have realized that this dream among all the others stirring in my heart, is one that can change not only my life, but the lives of others.

So today as I shared my dream with Ben I realized that God has birthed this dream in my heart, and Ben confirmed that as he spoke about all of us having a history with our dream, so you might ask, what is that dream?

Well along with everything else God has me doing right now, I would also like to become a motivational speaker, inspiring young women to find the value in the Lord and not the world, while my long term goal is to find my own platform, find my own place, I would like to make it the Revolve Tour stage, I would like to share with 1,000 of girls my story and how I went from finding my value in the world, to finding my value in the Lord, the journey God has taken me on and how He can bring them out of the darkness into light as well.

To some of you this might come as a surprise, because I HATE public speaking, I've been told I am good at it, and no one can ever tell when I am nervous, however I feel like I am going to throw up every time I have to speak on stage, whether it's in front of complete strangers or a group of my closest friends. However I think God is going to use this in big ways to stretch me beyond my wildest dreams.

So there you have it on "paper" I want to be a public speaker, I know crazy right?! WELL today I filmed a part of the DreamYear trailer at Dream Year weekend and for once I felt comfortable in front of the camera, I felt comfortable sharing my heart not only to a camera but to some complete strangers!

While the next few weeks are going to be a little crazy, I am going to continue to let God mold this dream in my heart, I am going to spend the rest of the weekend soaking up some amazing encouragement from some fellow dreamers, Ben and the rest of the Dream Year Crew and I am going to hold on tight as God takes me on a WILD RIDE!